Interrogating the Church, 05 – Listening:

All too often, the church has been guilty of not listening to people in the larger society. We have acted as though they are enemies to fear, rather than people to love. Our unwillingness to listen creates further distance between us and our neighbors, as it denies their humanity and anything of worth they might have to offer.

There is more than one way to use the term pride. I am proud of my kids. That is not the same thing as the sin of pride. What the Bible is concerned about is when we place ourselves as superior to others. That's not what LGBTQ+ pride is about. That is not what Black pride is about. That is not what efforts to grant native and immigrant peoples spaces for displaying their pride in their heritage and contributions is about. It is recognizing the inherent worth of the community and that there is much diversity among those who still belong.

For those struggling with a queer identity in terms of perceptions of sin, I would offer the following advice.

I encourage you to listen deeply to your queer child or friend. Their experience of life and their understanding of who they are may not match your experience. That's more than OK.

We used to tie up left-handed people's dominant hands to force them to use their right hands. We finally recognized this as abuse and there was nothing wrong with being left-handed.

Galileo was called a user of magic for using lenses to clarify his vision. People claimed he was involved in witchcraft and the work of Satan. We don't think of optometrists as magicians anymore.

Ask your queer kid/friend why that flag is important to them. Ask them why the name they have chosen matters. Ask them how it makes them feel when one or another name is used. Ask them to describe their world and how they understand it to be different from your own. Ask them how they came to the conclusion that they were transgender, gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, or otherwise queer.

Don't ask these questions, however, if you can't separate yourself from emotional responses to what you do not understand. Ask only if you can place yourself in a position to hear them out completely. Only ask for understanding and clarification. Do not to interrupt, re-direct, or try to correct them.

Take what you have heard and sit with it for a week. Watch your child/friend. Gauge how they respond to yourself and others. See what you can learn about them you did not know before.

That’s what it means to listen. In many ways, that is actually the opposite of what the Bible calls the sin of pride. Pride as sin assumes that we already know the answers, that we are superior, that others need to shift their lives according to reality as we understand it. Pride extends to telling other people that they are inferior and less human that we are. That’s why so many people outside the church see common condemnations of the queer community as hypocritical and hateful. Only love can actually heal those wounds, and love requires listening intently.



— ©Copyright 2023, Christopher B. Harbin 



http://www.sermonsearch.com/contributors/104427/

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

False Accusations

Image
The religious community around Jesus had no kind words about sectors of society. They were certain Torah provided full justification for blanket condemnation of Samaritans, tax collectors, and a women caught in adultery and thrown at Jesus’ feet. Jesus embraced them with no condemnation. They were so sure Jesus was a threat. They were seeking any means of silencing him. They were not above false accusations or paying people to lie about Jesus’ supposed breaches of law. The accusations did not hold up to scrutiny. I’ve been to numerous drag shows at East Frank. I’ve been to drag story hour. I’ve developed relationships with many among the clientele at East Frank, with drag performers, with queer people around us, and others who support this community. I have also heard all sorts of accusations tossed out against them. None of the accusations stands up to scrutiny. I’ve seen videos merging clips from adult drag shows with scenes from East Frank. I’ve heard and s
Read more

Something More Important

Image
I was given a new title recently. It was not one I had ever expected to receive. I’ve had lots of titles over the years. I’ve been minister of music. I’ve been evangelism director. I’ve been Sunday school teacher. I’ve been summer missionary. I’ve been youth leader. I’ve been seminarian. I’ve been church planter. I’ve been pastor. I’ve been professor. I’ve been missionary. I’ve been guest lecturer. I’ve been interpreter. Over the years, I have been licensed to preach twice. I’ve been ordained. I’ve been commissioned six times. I’m currently in the process of having my ordination recognized by another denomination. While I have embraced those events setting me apart for Christian service, I can’t say any of those events quite measure up to the new title I was recently given. A couple of weeks ago, I was at a family-friendly drag show. It was not the first time. Since helping Union County, NC host its first Pride festival last year, I have been around a company of drag que
Read more

The Gospel Is Not Conservative

Image
Fundamentalism and conservativism are intrinsically averse to change. They are tied with conserving a status quo or moving back to a former era. They seek a safe place, a respite from change and transformation in the world around them. They are threatened by new ideas. They fear that the foundations on which they base their lives will be uprooted, causing their view of reality to fall apart. Growth depends on change. Life requires change. Survival depends on responding to changes in our environment. It requires new ideas. It requires new answers to old questions, as well as new questions with even newer answers. Jesus was by no means conservative. Jesus challenged the status quo. He fought against the groundwork of much of the religious thought around him, as well as the structures erected to empower its values. He called out those who benefited from social, religious, and political power. He demonstrated God's love, forgiveness and grace to those deemed una
Read more